Has your mom ever emailed you saying, “I might be going to jail.”?
Mine just did.
She has to go to Texas on the 29th to talk about her fine. The worst case scenario is that they’ll put her in jail.
Or, she could be put into a Halfway house…thing, and pay off her fine.
OR, they might let her go home and pay off her fine.
The way her life is going? I’d say it’s one of the top two.
I don’t know what to feel at this point. Her emails still open but I don’t have a word for a reply. What am I supposed to say?
“Oh gee mom, I’m sorry. I’m sure they’ll send you home! YEA! GOTTA THINK OMPTIMISTICALLY!”
I am getting ready.to.fucking.scream.
OF ALL FUCKING TIME TO FUCKING TO PULL THIS SHIT.
IT’S FUCKING PISSING ME OFF! I’M TIRED OF THIS FUCKING BULLSHIT. IT’S GETTING OLD. “I’M SORRY FOR ALL THE PAIN AND PROBLEMS I’VE CAUSED YOU?” IF YOU WERE FUCKING SORRY YOU’D GET YOUR FUCKING ACT STRAIGHT. YOU’D FUCKING GO TO GAMBLERS ANON. YOU’D FUCKING *TRY* INTEAD OF FUCKING COMPLAINING ALL THE GODDAMN TIME. I’VE FUCKING TRIED AND TRIED AGAIN TO FUCKING HELP YOU. BUT EVERYTIME SOMEONE FUCKING TRIES TO DO THAT, YOU FUCKING IGNORE THEM! YOU WANT A FUCKING SOLUTION? GO TO FUCKING JAIL! MAYBE YOU’LL FUCKING STRAIGHTEN UP AFTER FUCKING BEING IN THERE! JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. MAYBE IF YOU’RE AWAY FROM YOUR CHILDREN, AWAY FROM THE PEOPLE YOU FUCKING LOVE, MAYBE THEN YOU’LL REALIZE, “OH FUCK. I REALLY SCREWED THIS SHIT UP.”
I AM FUCKING SICK AND TIRED OF THIS FUCKING STUPID BULLSHIT. ALL SHE FUCKING DOES IS PULL THIS SHIT.
“OH PRAY FOR ME.”
HOW ABOUT I PRAY, INSTEAD, FOR A FUCKING MOM! THAT’S ALL I FUCKING WANT! IS MY MOM. BUT NO, SHE’S GOING TO *FUCKING GODDAMN TEXAS* AND SHE MIGHT NOT BE COMING BACK FOR A WHILE!
THIS.IS.FUCKING.BULLSHIT!
ALL MY LIFE, I’VE HAD TO HEAR ABOUT PEOPLE’S FUCKING MOMS. MY OWN DAD’S MOM JUST DIED. AT LEAST SHE WAS ACTUAL FUCKING THERE FOR HIM AND RIVAL. MY MOM? NO, SHE’S IN FUCKING *TEXAS*
FUCKING.TEXAS.
SHE’S NOT FUCKING CARING ABOUT WHAT THE FUCK I FEEL. NO, SHE’S ALWAYS FUCKING CONCERNED ABOUT *HER* SHE CAN SAY ME AND MY BROTHERS ARE HER WORLD, BUT YOU KNOW WHAT?
*SHE’S* HER OWN FUCKING WORLD.
AND I’M FUCKING SICK.AND.TIRED.OF.IT.
FUCK.HER.
(maybe some that shit was unfair. But I don’t care. I am fucking PISSED.)
(And of all weekends, when Duo is in the city. FUCK!)
Yea, that hit me only last Friday as I was walking down the hallways.
Honestly, I don’t know what to feel these days. I’m in a realitionship with a guy who’s honestly trying to damn hard, and I don’t know how to break up with him without hurting him x10.
I also like someone else, who…happens to be a junior.
and has a girlfriend.
… It seems the saying, “The good ones are always taken” is true. >.>;;
It feels like the whole Garrett thing all over again.
I just wish I could be with someone I can relate too. The guy I happen to like is actually -interested- in the things -I’m- interested. The guy I’m with now is just watching the things I watch based on the fact I watch them.
He bought a fucking Naruto headband because I have one.
…>_______< And that’s one thing I absolutely hate.
Because apparently, when Brandon told him to watch Naruto, he didn’t. But when *I* said he should, he did.
HSHJGDHJKSR. That is really fucking annoying. I’m glad you like me that much, but if you honestly liked me that much, you’d just be yourself for christs sake.
In any event even when I do break up with him, I highly doubt I’ll ever date the guy I actually like. But hell, who knows? He always talks to me in the hallways and just today he randomly poked me for a few seconds. >////<
Jeez I feel like a silly teenage girl.
In other news, hopefully I’ll be able to be Haruhi Suzumiya for Halloween. I dunno if I’ll make it though, I might just buy one. =3
Anyway, I’ve got to get to bed.
P.S. as for dealing with the death, that’s been going more…smoothly? I don’t know. I keep wishing she was here. Oh well, at least she’s not having to worry about shit. Although, knowing her, she’s prolly worrying about us all right now….-___________-”
